First Gym Characters Post

This is the First Gym Characters post

First Fitness and Sports Post

This is the first fitness and sports post

One Last Fight For Charity

Back in 2007 I was bullied and abused by five members of the Plantation Florida Police Department. They responded to an incident I have included in my new book “Jobs, Heroes, Zeros and Thieves.” The writing details my entire work history of 51 jobs in 59 years, my FDNY response on 9/11/2001, and the family of thieves who robbed me while the Plantation Police stood by and attempted to label me the villain.

Plantation Police continue to make excuses and refuses to investigate the men who violated my rights. Through the Freedom of Information Act and with the help from a local T.V. investigative reporter, the Plantation P.D. was forced to take some action against the thieves who have moved to Tallahassee, FL. Out of concern that certain members of this police department would come to my home and cause harm to my wife and I, we moved to North Carolina.

I want the world to know I’ve issued a challenge to the five officers who abused me to box against me on November 18th at Madison Square Garden. They can fight three minutes a piece and I will fight two fights. The proceeds will all go to the UFA Widows’ and Children’s Fund and Special Operations Warrior Foundation, my favorite charities.

I come from a family of cops. I know that 99% of them do a courageous and professional job, but my opinion of their top brass is that they cover up for and refuse to investigate my complaints. There is much more to this story and my book brings the sordid details to life. I can’t wait to meet the tough-talking five in the ring where there are no teammates, no time outs, and no place to hide. All five demonstrated a particular dislike for the uniformed services of N.Y.C.

I am postponing my hip and shoulder replacement so I can suck it up one more time and meet the five bullies in the ring. Hope all of my readers can attend. For every sale of my book “Jobs Heroes, Zeros, and Thieves,” $2.00 will be donated to the above charities. Never say die.

Yours in health,
“The Fighting Fireman”

The Untrainable

The misfits wander around the gym causing mischief rather
than working out. They have the attention span of a five year old
and that being said, I’m most probably doing an injustice to children
of this age. 90% walk around the gym sporting huge bellies and hips,
while taking crotch shots, bumping into colleagues in the nude, snapping
totally nude photos when tired of the hand on the crotch pose, and engage
in tickle fights rather than work on their sagging physiques. If you haven’t
guessed yet of whom I speak I will sum it up for you politely. The president
and entire congress of the United States of America.
As stipulated by legislation crafted by both parties in their own penmanship,
their gym memberships are paid for by the taxpayers. While true that rest is
the most important ingredient when you workout seriously, this group of hypocritical
liars, cowards and thieves do everything imaginable to avoid work. The exercise
mantra of “no pain no gain” is a phrase this group mostly never experienced, and
those exposed was only for a brief moment before becoming a novice politician, and
being sucked into a lecherous gang of elite thieves concerned about self-gratification.
When you ask them to do the heavy lifting they all point fingers and ridicule friends
and colleagues alike. Your only recourse is to shake your head and laugh in their face,
as they blame their sad sack work ethics, enormous girth, 90% body fat, and foul body
odor on those about them. They continuously find fault with basic gym equipment and
blame their failing bodies on not being able to spend lavishly on equipment the taxpayer
cannot afford to give them. When the taxpayer asks them to provide their personal cash to
guarantee the new equipment requested, not a soul volunteers.
A member by the name of John Kerry (a wealthy multi-millionaire) blamed his problems
on a group of middle class Americans who wanted the politicians to kick in with their
personal stash. This was offensive to this man (Kerry) who recently purchased a luxury yacht;
(made in New Zealand) “why buy American and give our citizens jobs” is John’s motto. His colleague
and gym partner (Barney Frank) recently cleared out the gym when he farted louder than he did
on the Rachel Maddow show. This man is so lazy the treadmill had to be adjusted to .01 mile
per hour in order to accommodate him. John McCain enjoys filling up the weight bar but never
completes a repetition. He just admires the poundage and talks to anyone who is dumb enough
to listen. He did move rather quickly when Rhambo Emanuel sidled up to him in the nude. George
W. Bush continued to use the gym when his second term was finished, but refused to cough up
due’s money required for retired politician’s, and was officially banned for life.
The gym is empty today because the president and congress are enjoying another five
week vacation. This is strange because they really haven’t worked or exercised in decades. All
either party has done is set back the fitness world, and fill their muscle sells with the fatty pork
they’ve been peddling and eating for centuries, while hard working people with blue collar bodies
toil for their pleasure. There are times when a coach is forced to give up on certain players
because of a bad attitude and reckless action. The time has come for the United States of America
to demand a spanking new team with no losers to infect them. They all must go!!!
Coach Reilly

My Special Teams Play

I was the wedge breaker on my college football team for four years and can describe from experience the attitude of reckless abandon you must command to excel at this position. Better than average speed and great strength are the required talents. Being able to tackle with ferocity and having a direct nose for the ball should be an ingrained skill when you apply for the honor of wedge breaker. You toil in anonymity and only your team mates and coaches appreciate what you bring to the game. My job was to spearhead the other 9 (our kicker never tackled anybody) kamikaze’s running down the gridiron at breakneck speed, wreaking havoc on any human in your path, to attain the honor of separating the ball carrier from the pigskin, or burying him in the turf.

I’ll never forget the opening kickoff my freshman year when our kickers cleat met the pigskin and I sprinted straight for the vaunted wedge of the University of Missouri at Rolla. Our coach had me completely psyched to search and destroy, after drilling our team as to how devastating their huge phalanx of blockers would come at us in hopes of springing their man for pay-dirt. I saw them forming as blades of green kicked up from my furiously churning metal spikes. The sun was blinding my wide eyes off their glazed golden helmets, and I could smell the cut of fresh grass as I hurled my speeding body at the perfectly wedged formation. I caught them in the mid body waist-high, while I twisted my elongated physique to promote the most damage. The front three sprawled over me after my vicious assault, and two more hit the turf as my momentum propelled me forward. One of these players caused two more of his team mates to spill to the manicured grass, and I managed to get a hand on the foot of the ball carrier before one of my freed up mates slammed him at the twelve yard line. The stars I saw from helmets, pads, arms and knees enveloping and striking my body quickly subsided, as the official blew his whistle to halt play and mark the line of scrimmage.

As an up-back on the punting team my route to the receiver is direct, but I was forced to navigate through the blockers to attack my prey. More attention has to be paid to the opposition blocking the punt before I can release to search and destroy. On punts you are subject to cut back blocks more frequently than while attacking a wedge, so you must keep your wits about you while running hell-bent to attack the ball carrier. One thing I can assure my readers is that special teams is not for the weak of heart and those that refrain from contact. You are assured to face all obstacles head on because there is nothing quite like the challenge this thrilling position presents!

By: Coach Reilly